September is upon us. I had a great weekend to finish August off. We spent the weekend at Lake Tahoe and it was just so beautiful! There were a lot of kids and I found myself hoping to have a little one of my own too that I can take to our various travels. We found ourselves talking about what we would let our child/ren do. What a perfect place to take kids!
Despite that fact, we had a blast, which we always do. We are good company to each other. Apart from my supplement regimen, I did not obsess about my condition, which to me, is a success. I seek to let go of that which I have no control over. The only time we do not see eye to eye when it comes to getaways is that hubs is not a nightlife person. When I am on vacation, I want to let loose and go all out, which includes dancing the night away or listening to music at a lounge. He would rather go back to the room and “watch” each other or TV.
One of the reasons I am glad to see September is that August kinda bombed on me… just like July. No ovulation=no chance for baby, and that is what Aug meant to me. I also turned a year older, so did hubs. Is there a way to stop the clock while we deal with this monster called unconventional baby-making?
This is my second week on the estrogen pills and let me tell ya, I am feeling bloated and have gained 5 lbs. in one week. I am at my heaviest weight and I am truly worried. Is this supposed to happen with just high dose Estrogen? Am I looking at more weight gain with the other meds? That worries me. At the risk of sounding vain; I would rather not be gaining a pound. How can I deal with this? I exercised each morning we were at Tahoe and intend to continue exercising. I do feel heavy, bloated, occasional mild cramping, sore mammary glands (lol) and of course I feel so huge. Am I even supposed to be exercising heavily at this time? On the bright side, the hot flushes have completely abated... I mean, gone with no peeking behavior. Something they did with the low dose patches.
The goal is to get on Follistim if my ovaries respond to 1.5 mg/day of Estrogen. I worry that this high dose of Estrogen will make me susceptible to breast cancer but I have to try. I will not be the first nor the last to give this a try. So God help me.
As for my dear Hopie Hope, I love you before I have even met you, wherever you are... so does your handsone daddy! We can't wait to meet you munchkin...
"For I know the Plans I have for you, says the Lord".
I love the fact that you write to your little one in faith. It is awfully inspiring to me... I have often thought of what he may look like but never have I spoke to him as if I was awaiting his arrival. Thank you for being transparent and for quoting scripture as well, it was a reminder to me and really helpful...
ReplyDeleteThanks! I have wondered whether it borders dysfunctional when I talk to my non-existent child. But then again, what is not dysfuntional about this journey? I am glad that I inspire you to have the same hope that I hang on to despite the constant negative news..
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